As a blogger, you should be as social as possible. Surrounding yourself with your readers, your friends, and anyone else you happen to meet on the road to success. But there is one group of people we tend to stay away from: our enemies. Just that word alone sends annoyance throughout my body, but I can’t help but think they serve more of a purpose than just to piss us off.
When I use the word “enemies,” I am really talking about the people you dislike in the blogosphere. They don’t have to necessarily be somebody you know, and they don’t have to know you. They can be your competition, or someone you just don’t like. Pretty much, anyone who rubs you the wrong way.
These people are just as important to us as our friends are to us. I believe they have different effects on us. Our friends are always there to motivate us and keep us relaxed. Our enemies are here to annoy us and make us work harder to beat them (but they don’t want you to beat them).
I also think the enemies we make are here to serve us a reality check from time-to-time. You know, to knock us down when our ego becomes too large (or is large ego a good thing?), and help us face reality. The reality that maybe we’re doing something wrong, or not doing it good enough.
You can be the nicest person in the world, and still have enemies. It’s a good thing, trust me. But, when it comes to making enemies, you might need some help. I mean, it’s kind of like an art to get people to hate you in the right way.
How to Make Enemies
Let me just start off by saying that you will not make the good kind of enemies by doing it in the “traditional way” of being a jerk, flaming other bloggers and just being an all-around bad person. Those are not the ways we want people to hate us.
Instead, we want our enemies to come from the quality of work we do. The better work we do, the more things people will have to say about it. Mostly good things, but there will be some bad things that follow suit. Basically, if you’re pissing somebody off than you’re doing something right.
So, the way to make the enemies that actually help you do better at blogging is by simply being you. Work the way you want to work, blog about whatever you want, however you want. All you have to do is be yourself, don’t even think about making enemies or even friends for that matter.
People will hate you naturally. They may bash your stuff, and they may steal your work (does stealing mean they love you?). But how does just being yourself and trying to create a reputable blog make people dislike you?
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Jealousy
Jealousy is a weird kind of emotion, and makes people do weird things. Some may just not want to come to your blog because you’re so good that it makes them feel bad about their blog, and some will just get so jealous that they make a vow to do better than you. And when you’re just that good at what you do, then you’re on your way to making some enemies!
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Disagreement
People can hate you simply for your opinions. The more of your opinion you inject into your articles, the more people you will see coming out and disagreeing with you. Debates are fine and perfectly respectable, but some people will just totally dislike you for your different opinions. And that’s great, because if everyone agrees with you all the time, then your content might suck.
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Ego
I know there are people out there who will want to strike you down just because you may be weaker than them, and they think they can outsmart you by acting rude. This doesn’t happen very often, and in fact I have only seen it once on my own blog in the 3 years I have been blogging (but I see it on plenty of large sites all the time.)
Are Enemies Really That Important?
Maybe I overhyped it a bit, and maybe I just didn’t convince you enough that making enemies is good for you. As always, I’d love to hear your opinion on the subject and would love to even debate with you on this idea.
Of course, don’t be afraid to say what you think. That’s how you make enemies, right?
31 Discussions
Anyone who doesn’t believe in me half as much as I believe in myself is an enemy. I don’t have many enemies, but the ones I do have serve as fuel for my fire. I want to prove them wrong and have them beg me to teach them what I know. So… I agree, Alex. Enemies are good!
Nick Tart´s last blog ..Joe Penna Interview- YouTube’s Mystery Guitar Man
That’s the spirit Nick! Enemies are good, don’t let that word deceive you haha.
Thanks for stopping by as always.
I love looking at things from a different point of view. I agree with you as well Alex. I always say you can learn from everything, even the bad things. In the same manner having enemies is a great motivator.
Christopher´s last blog ..Getting Off My Own Back and Sprucing Up
There’s always different ways to look at something, and I think this isn’t something that gets looked at in too many different ways honestly.
Thanks for the comment Chris.
Hey Alex,
Really Great Post dude. I’ve to agree with you alex. I really like the idea of having enemies.
Thanks for sharing this great Post man. Great work.
~Dev
Dev @ Make Money Blogging´s last blog ..Weekly Roundup- Link Love To Blogging Friends
Glad you liked the post man, thanks for stopping by!
Hi Alex,
I think one should show their views and opinions without having any kind of fear. Now of course in doing so, you may make some enemies. I think there is nothing wrong with this, as this is a natural occurrence, even in our offline lives.
Nabeel
Honestly, if you don’t throw your opinion into the article then you’re probably writing some boring posts! The more disagreements the better I say.
Hey Alex,
Nice post, but I’m afraid I don’t agree. Isn’t enemy too strong a word? If I have an enemy, I want him to go down, while I go up (and he’ll want the same thing to happen to me). This is not necessarily a bad thing, but I think it’s completely unnecessary. ‘Rival’ is a better term.
I think this is the first time I’m disagreeing with you
Regards
Ajay
Enemy is definitely a strong word, and it may be stronger than what I meant. In the post I’m referring to enemies as your competitors, just with a stronger tone haha.
But yes, you want your enemies to go down and you work hard to try to make it happen.
I’m glad you disagree, it’s an “iffy” topic lol. Thanks for the opposing argument.
I’ve never looked at it that way before. This is why I enjoy readings your blog, who would have thought that making enemies oculd be just as important as making friends on the blogosphere.
Dean Saliba´s last blog ..Adsdaq A Reliable Network In An Unreliable Market
Glad you like it Dean, always try to post the most interesting stuff I can.
Interesting way to look at it. I don’t think making enemies is an important part of blogging. Yes, its not possible to please everyone all the time and criticism should be expected from time to time and should be received just as well a compliment is.
People who has something different or critical to say say about your work need not be your “enemy” as such. But yes, its true that competition fuels us to do better and achieve even greater things.
By the way, you never fail to impress me with you’re perspective on the things surrounding the blogosphere. Nice read.
Shashank´s last blog ..Comment Handling – the Right Way
You can’t make everyone happy, no. And you shouldn’t try either, I agree.
Thanks for stopping by, glad you like the posts here.
may be in one way, my competitors or my enemies keep me going in the blogosphere…i do not say that enemies are only in the blogging world….the people around me who say that blogging is s**t keeps me going and i want to prove them that blogging can get you money
Tushar´s last blog ..After 6 Months of BloggersPassion- Where We Stand
Haha, I’m with you too! A lot of people stereotype blogging as just talking about yourself…but that’s not always the case at all!
Really great post Alex,
I initially disagreed but after giving it an after thought, I eventually agreed.
Your friends will not let you know about your mistakes but your enemies with (that alone is enough to make me love having enemies:)).
Thanks so much for the great post,
-Onibalusi
Onibalusi Bamidele´s last blog ..How to Write Popular Posts That Get Traffic – Analysis of 5 Top Blogs
I guess I’m lucky then, because the friends I have online won’t hesitate to tell me when I mess up haha.
Alex,
I agree with the sentiment if not the wording. I must agree with some that “enemy” really doesn’t sit right.
I agree because I can vouch. I’ve had more then one, umm, well…..vehemently disagree
with me on certain issues, as I write what I feel, including brutal honestly if necessary.
On my blog and in comments, which I dare to say is most likely where my “enemies” stem from.
Tip: A blogger natural fear of being “outed” as a comment deleter is an awesome thing to play off of.
Dennis Edell @ Direct Sales Marketing´s last blog ..Aweber Affiliate Link Contest Update – WINNER-
I’m starting to think that “enemy” may be a bit overhyped…but isn’t that good journalism!? I’m just kidding haha, but I do think that maybe it’s a bit much now.
Yes, the comments seem to bring out the enemies in the group, but at least those people say their crap to your face haha.
I think that enemies are your best friends because your enemies usually pinpoint your weaknesses and they can help you to become a better person and better blogger.
Asad @ Blogger Templates´s last blog ..SEO Tips for Blogger / Blogspot Blogs to Increase Traffic
I have to agree that enemies are just as important as friends. ESPECIALLY when what you need is more attention. For instance, in the movie star arena there is an old saying that Bad Publicity is still good publicity. The reason behind that is because your “enemy” has just started mass post your links, name, website, portfolio, business name, etc. to all their followers, friends, associates, & passerby’s.
These followers of them naturally will research more about you and even visit your website. Some of these followers may not agree with the person whom said such bad things about about. As we know, every human being has a difference of opinion and no 2 people are exactly alike when it comes to taste.
Inevitably, the enemy that may have tried to defame you, just gave you the ultimate BOOST with free viral advertising. Now, I’m not saying you should go out & deliberately make enemies or do unethical things. But I am saying that people normally judge for them self & that the free advertising you get from an enemy isn’t always a bad thing.
Hmm, I actually do think these brats exist, the type of bloggers who think too much of themselves in which they don’t really notice what’s bad and what’s not in interacting with people within the industry. Having them can be both advantageous and not so beneficial, because if you try to fight the ones who have tons of backups (other bloggers) then expect for the worst for your reputation, well I’m not really sure if this happens but it’s best to keep it safe. You can always stay away from the fight knowing that it’s not your real objective in the first place, right?
Regards,
Jason
Alex.. I luv this post man.. I have a Top blogger “enemy” and I use that to work harder, makes me want out rank, out traffic out everything him..lol
If you come with Hard Work, Passion and throw in some Anger.. you have a nix for some blogging explosion man..
Harness the anger “enemies” and use it to fuel you thru the days you r to tired to blog, to tired to promote.. rtc..
John Paul Aguiar´s last blog ..How I Got 253 Twitter ReTweets On 5 Posts
I had an “issue” with someone who is also a blogger because different opinions, but now we are good together and i feel good.
Somehow, i feel awkward to be on the Internet, and had an “issue” with someone whom i have even never met..
Kimi´s last blog ..WordPress “Reading Settings”
“In order to have an enemy, one must be somebody. One must be a force before he can be resisted by another force. A malicious enemy is better than a clumsy friend.”
A quote that i have picked up in the net. Ever in my life, i haven’t had much enemies per say. In fact, i don’t think i ever have one. There are some that I dislike but I don’t address them as an ‘enemy’ .
However,as mentioned by alex, enemies or such ‘disliked person’ are apparently those that you will grow out from.
I personally believe that my greatest enemy is myself. =)
twisted but true. not that i am crazy or such. but for the fact that i am always trying to be better than what i am. If today i could do this, i hope to be better at what i did yesterday. does that sound ‘enemy-ish”? i think it does.
anyway alex,
great post. i am sure that someday ,we would eventually have to come across such circumstances. it is up to us to learn from it or weep.
cheers
Febap Liew | Making Money Online Today´s last blog ..Fundamental Basis Of Clickbank – Know Your Basics
Nice post, thanks for sharing this by all means. Competition is commonly encounter in blogging business, along with this comes jealousy, ego, and etc. This is an ideal thing about blogging, glad to read this one.
Enemies is important I think because it will motivate you to do a lot of positive things to prevent a lost from your enemies. Beat your enemies with sportive method and you’ll be proud of yourself.
I think its great because it forces you to prove them wrong and makes you think outside your box. When people give you negative feedback, its a good time to turn it into a constructive way of making your blog better.
Kristin´s last blog ..Photographing- Rebecca and Dan’s Wedding
I have a few IM people that I don’t like because they charge for products which should be clearly less hyped and offered for free. Of course, I’m not the one to say if they should do either of these but it still irks me to see so many trying to give people the run around when it comes to information.
I have that old school mentality from the early web – most should be free but if it will have a fee, it better be damn well worth it.
That’s one of the main reasons why I started the blog – wanted to make sure people have the free option
Murlu´s last blog ..How-To Setup A Simple Online Store Using Paypal
Having competitors is key to success and its fun to fight in niche business i like this awesome post
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